Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I Sought My Soul...

I sought my soul, I could not see.

I sought my God, but He eluded me.

I searched out my brothers and sisters, and found all three:

My fellow man, my God and me.



My old sponsor used to say this to me frequently. I think it very closely describes my experience in AA. Going out to the Forest last weekend was yet another beautiful experience.



I have a tendency, however, to want to think that all I need to do is pray and spend quiet time in nature, and that'll bring me closer to God. And, maybe it does. But, what I really find is that I get much greater understanding by just spending my time with other people - talking to them. By nature, I'm sort of a loner. I like people, but I just like to be alone, doing my own thing. It's kind of my default. When I get out of myself and listen and talk to others, something spiritual happens. When any two are gathered in His name, He promises His presence.



That said, the best part of Cook Forest last weekend for me was the time I spent and conversations I had with other drunks. I even met a guy who happened to be coming to my town yesterday for business, and I asked him to lead our home group. Fantastic!



Other-centeredness. This is what we are called to. I often have to think back to our 7th step, in which we ask God to remove our character defects to the extent that their removal will enable us to be of greater service or value to God and our fellows. So, God could take me out to the Forest and impart all sorts of peace and serenity into me if he wanted, I suppose. But, we all benefit when I get out of myself and start taking an interest in somebody else's life. What a concept!



I realized not too long ago (perhaps a year or so), that there are very few people that I admire. This, of course is a result of my ego and my self-centeredness. I have started to look for the remarkable qualities in all people. It is amazing what I will see once I start looking. It takes some work on my part, but with some effort, I can get myself back down to the right size and see that other people really do have qualities, experiences and talents that are beyond those of my own. When my ego is running the show, that is a threatening proposition. But, when my ego is in check, what a joy it becomes to see those things in people! Chuck C. says to enjoy our competitors' shot as much as our own - that way we double our enjoyment. So it is with recognizing the greatness in others.



Anyway, nice little rant...



I will have pictures from Cook Forest up soon.





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